eHarmony failure

sounds rough, all the best man!

 

Hi Daniel,

First of all, good luck with your eye surgery. Sounds like you should focus on that for now, until both eyes are done and your vision is back to where you want it to be.

Given your self-characterization above, you'll have to think about what type of woman will want to take you on as a project. Octavia hit the mark dead-on with her comments above.

If your self-characterization is accurate and you are content to remain that way, then no worries - but it's not likely that Ms. Right will drop into your life. OTOH if there's room to improve that characterization as well as your self-esteem, maybe that should be considered.

 

Daniel, we have a funny eharmony story. Our friend Georgia in Monatana signed up for eharmony. She put in all the relevant criteria, and after a bit, was told that no one met "her match" ... even all the way across the U.S. And so Georgia "lightened up" her expectations. Again, all across the U.S. ... no one met her expectations. It was particularly funny to us because Georgia is very similar to my wife. Long story short - after Georgia had given up on eharmony's plan, Georgia met a fellow (great guy) just a few miles away (in the Flathead Valley Mt) . . . and within a year, they were married. Irony of ironies.

 

+1 on the HOT comment - especially the new profile picture (just an observation).

Daniel, you should see how much guys lie on an average night at the bar trying to pick up women. I get the feeling you'd be shocked.

stupid commercial (in fact, I stopped buying Levis because of all their dumbass new commercials), but it conveys my point effectively:
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zP0pN-aLcI"]YouTube - Levi's: Secrets and Lies[/ame]

A lot of dating sites are practically "whites only," according to some of my non-white/caucasian/whatever friends. The women are often simply not interested in men who are not white (judging from the differing experiences of several people I know).

 

No. Georgia's been taken.

 

This discussion reminds me of the advice to ladies seeking matrimony to consider the abundance of men in Alaska, where "the odds are good, but the goods are odd." As we mature, demographics shift to more women than men. In spite of this shift, bachelors seeking partners must never forget that 'polishing the goods still favors the odds.'

 

Feh, my dating qualifications are apparently pretty simple. She has to be on meds. Not your average over-the-counter anti-depressant candy or self-medicated alcoholism. Oh no! It has to be the blatantly-labeled anti-psychotic stuff like lithium or seroquel. (If you see anyone taking that, RUN RUN RUN!!)

My unpredictable and unstable life attracts unstable people, or maybe I just do.

No offense, but trikes don't excite the ladies. The only guys I know who rode trikes were hard core bikers who were in debilitating motorcycle accidents.

Daniel, try taking an MSF class (Motorcycle Safety Foundation). They provide small learner bikes, so see if you can't keep a two-wheel one upright. You don't know until you try, and you'll learn the right/safe way to ride.

Personally I think your problem is more of an attitude thing. One of the things "Why women love bastards" teaches you is that women don't want deep and thoughtful conversation on your first date. Resist the temptation to argue with her, at least until MUCH later in the relationship.

For example:

Her: "I vote republican because democrats want to take all my money".

"I believe doctors are evil and allopathy[sic] is the only real medicine!"

"I heard somewhere that global warming is fake!"

You: Hmm? (because you were too busy staring at her breasts to pay attention) Yeah...whatever. Listen. I think you'd look hot and sexy on the back of my bike. What do you say we head out for a ride and have a drink at my place?

Works for me.

 

Thanks Daniel. Always nice to hear when someone thinks I'm pretty.

I'm in agreement. I did try them but have not been back. Now that I think of it though.... the few dates I did go on from there were the ones that seemed to have the most long term potential.

If I have to admit that I have to travel to Alaska to find a partner, I might consider just chucking the whole life-partner part of the plan. Not that there is anything at all wrong with Alaska... Just... cold there. I can feel my motivation for this whole dating thing starting to slip. I know women in their 50's who have pretty much thrown in the towel. I did say that if what's ahead of me is just ten years of searching followed by a towel-throw-in, I'd rather surrender early.

Maybe that's my problem. I keep trying to talk during my dates.

BTW, bikes don't do it for every woman. I see that a guy owns a bike and I tend to run!

 

You can run, but can you run faster than a bike?

Tom

 

This approach probably has the best odds of success anyway!

 

:jaw:
ound:

Oh that is just too funny. You will NEVER find a person with those mutually-exclusive traits, the the divorce rate is proof of it.

A hint though on the age thing: if you score a guy 15-20 years older than you are, then you are a gold digger.

If - on the other hand - you score a guy 15-20 years YOUNGER than you are (Though at least 18, or whatever age is necessary to avoid Statuatory Rape charges), then you are a Cougar

My advice? Find a wealthy guy 75 years old, who is in poor health. Ideally he has an 18 year old Olympic Track Star son. The ideal situation would be the 18 year old track star, AND an 18 year old groundskeeper

:rockon:

I am too, but I'm not saying that is why I get laid. Perhaps it doesn't hurt though

:thumb:

I thought that was mandatory, perhaps even the law? Like driving fast at the Indy 500

There are plenty of kooky broads out there, but the sex is fantastic. It all balances out!

I prefer the nutty ones to be on Vitamin H: Haldol

Happens to me all the time. Matter of fact, some broads I could not even testify in court that they HAD heads. Because I sure never looked up past the cleavage line the entire time I knew them

I agree

If you want a lifelong, deeply loyal, and absolutely faithful companion, get a dog or cat

 

Yes! When success is defined as happiness for sure.

Why? I am all those things. I think it's perfectly reasonable to want to spend time with people who share similar values and bring similar traits to the table.
I instigated my divorce. I guess I just assume that I'm not all that unique and others might find themselves equally ill-matched and break out of lonely relationships in order to seek out others like them too...


Because I'm interested in being around people who share similar values and life goals, I don't put a lot of stock in having to share interests or culture ( the things age tends to predict). What the hell do I care what other people say? I will say though, that most of my friends are older than I am. Just tends to work out that way in my life.

 

Well, you could move to an area where the statistics favor hetero males. S.F. at one time had a 70-30 ratio of single hetero females to single hetero males. Nothing like a 2-1 selection bias. S.F. also has some great Indian restaurants in the bargain.

Of course, you might still miss the boat on the picky and rightness (not to mention the flabby and potbelly) potential issues.

Maybe it is time to assess how badly you want to date over the other considerations? As others have posted, maybe a cat or a dog might be the better solution.

 

And it saves on duct tape and flex cuffs.

Tom

 

I agree. More power to you.

 

I married my best friend.

We met online, helped each other deal with our respective divorces, cried on each other's shoulders about dating woes, and talked about our problems with our kids.

We decided we'd be better off just marrying each other and skipping that whole dating thing, since we weren't having much luck "out there."

Eleven years later, I wouldn't change a thing :thumb:

 

Here is an idea - move to say Argentina or Chile (Uruguay would work as well). Put the word out that you are looking for a hottie. The cost of living is lower there than here, and culturally, there is more tolerance of a male being 'right' than there is in the U.S.

It worked for Mark Sanford (at least for a while). And he was still married at the time.