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Burning Toyota Salesman ...

Discussion in 'Gen 2 Prius Main Forum' started by KK6PD, Jan 6, 2009.

  1. KK6PD

    KK6PD _ . _ . / _ _ . _

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    I have been a member and reading Prius Chat for about 9 months now. Love the group. I do notice however a plethora of posts voicing concerns, complaints and well just down right Hostility towards "Toyota Salesman". Some rightfully so!

    To that end I composed a reply to a particular dealers shenanigans.

    I think that it is worth putting out as a thread dedicated to "THOSE" Toyota Salesman who for whatever reason have offended we Prius owners, and soon to be Prius Buyers.

    So now on BBC1...

    Act 1 Scene 5

    'Burn the Toyota Salesman!'

    CARBUYERS: [chanting] Prius Iesu domine, dona eis Prius requiem. [bonk] Prius Iesu domine,... [bonk] ...dona eis Prius requiem. [bonk] Prius Iesu domine,... [bonk] ...dona eis Prius requiem.
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! [bonk] A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman!
    CARBUYERS:     [chanting] Prius Iesu domine...
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! We've found a Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! We've got a Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! Burn her! Burn her! Burn her! We've found a Toyota Salesman! We've found a Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman!
    JAYMAN:     We have found a Toyota Salesman. May we burn her? [​IMG]
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     Burn her! Burn! Burn her! Burn her!
    KK6PD:     How do you know she is a Toyota Salesman?
    DOC WILLIE:     She looks like one.
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     Right! Yeah! Yeah!
    KK6PD:     Bring her forward.
    TOYOTA SALESMAN    :I'm not a Toyota Salesman. I'm not a Toyota Salesman.
    KK6PD:     Uh, but you are dressed as one. [​IMG]
    TOYOTASALESMAN:     They dressed me up like this.
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     Augh, we didn't! We didn't...
    Toyotasalesman:     And this isn't my Prius ad. It's a false one.
    KK6PD:     Well?
    JAYMAN:     Well, we do like the car.
    KK6PD:     The car?
    JAYMAN:     And the SYNERGY DRIVE, but she is a Toyota Salesman!
    DOC WILLIE:     Yeah!
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     We burn her! Right! Yeaaah! Yeaah!
    KK6PD:     Did you dress up the advert like this?
    JAYMAN:     No!
    DOC WILLIE and ICARUS:     No. No.
    DOC WILLIE:     No.
    JAYMAN:     No.
    DOC WILLIE and ICARUS    : No.
    JAYMAN:     Yes.
    DOC WILLIE:     Yes.
    JAYMAN:     Yes. Yeah, a bit.
    ICARUS:     A bit.
    JAYMAN and DOC WILLIE:     A bit.
    ICARUS:     A bit.
    JAYMAN:     She has got a Touring Edition.
    RANDOM:     [cough]
    KK6PD:     What makes you think she is a Toyota Salesman?
    ICARUS:     Well, she turned me into a Volt.
    KK6PD:     A VOLT?
    ICARUS:     You know that Bailout nightmare GM Thinggie ..,but, I got better.
    DOC WILLIE:     Burn her anyway!
    JAYMAN:     Burn!
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     Burn her! Burn! Burn her!...
    KK6PD:     Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is a Toyota Salesman.
    JAYMAN:     Are there?
    DOC WILLIE:     Ah?
    JAYMAN:     What are they?
    PRIUSHATTERS:     Tell us! Tell us!...
    KK6PD:     Tell me. What do you do with Toyota Salesman?
    DOC WILLIE:     Burn!
    JAYMAN:     Burn!
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     Burn! Burn them up! Burn!...
    KK6PD:     And what do you burn apart from Toyota Salesman? J
    JAYMAN:     More Toyota Salesman!
    ICARUS:     Shh!
    DOC WILLIE:     Wood!
    KK6PD:     So, why do Toyota Salesman burn? [pause]
    ICARUS:     B--... 'cause they're made of... wood?
    KK6PD:     Good! Heh heh.
    PRUSCHATTERS:     Oh, yeah. Oh.
    KK6PD:     So, how do we tell whether she is made of wood?
    JAYMAN:     Build a bridge out of her, and drive a SUV across her!
    KK6PD: Ah, but can you not also make bridges out of stone?
    JAYMAN:     Oh, yeah.
    RANDOM:     Oh, yeah. True. Uhh...
    KK6PD:     Does wood sink in water?
    JAYMAN:     No. No.
    DOC WILLIE:     No, it floats! It floats!
    JAYMAN:     Throw her into the pond!
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     The pond! Throw her into the pond!
    KK6PD:     What also floats in water?
    JAYMAN:     Bread!
    DOC WILLIE:     Apples!
    ICARUS:     Uh, very small rocks!
    JAYMAN:     Cider!
    DOC WILLIE:     Uh, gra-- gravy!
    JAYMAN:     Cherries!
    DOC WILLIE:     Mud!
    ICARUS     Uh, churches! Churches!
    DOC WILLIE:     Lead! Lead!
    DANNY:     A Duck
    PRIUSCHATTERS: ooohhh!!!
     KK6PD: Exactly. So, logically...
    JAYMAN:     If... she... weighs... the same as a duck,... she's made of wood.
    KK6PD:     And therefore?
    DOC WILLIE:     A Toyota Salesman!
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     A Toyota Salesman!
    JAYMAN:     Toyota Salesman:
    PRUSCHATTERS: A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman!...
    PATSPARKS:     Here is a duck. Use this duck. [quack quack quack]
    KK6PD:     Very good. We shall use my largest scales.
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     Ohh! Ohh! Burn the Toyota Salesman! Burn the Toyota Salesman! Burn her! Burn her! Burn her! Burn her! Burn her! Burn her! Burn her! Ahh! Ahh...
    KK6PD:     Right. Remove the supports! [whop] [clunk] [creak] [​IMG]
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman! A Toyota Salesman!
    TOYOTASALESMAN:     It's a fair cop.
    ICARUS:     Burn her!
    PRIUSCHATTERS:     Burn her! Burn her! Burn her! Burn! Burn!...
    KK6PD:     Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?
    DANNY:     I am DANNY, King of the PRUSCHATTERS.
    KK6PD:     My liege!
    DANNY:     Good Sir Knight, will you come with me to Toyotalot and join us at the Prius Round Table?
    KK6PD:     My liege! I would be honored.
    DANNY:     What is your name?
    KK6PD:     'KK6PD', my liege.
    DANNY:     Then I dub you 'Sir KK6PD, Knight of the Prius Round Table'.

    [​IMG][​IMG][​IMG][​IMG] [​IMG][​IMG][​IMG] ------
    The Driinks are on me!!

    With apologies to Monty Pythons Flying Circus.

    It seemed to filll the bill for the I hate my Toyota Salesman, but I love my Prius people!!!

    73 de Pat KK6PD
     
    #1 KK6PD, Jan 6, 2009
  2. KK6PD

    KK6PD _ . _ . / _ _ . _

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    For those of you who missed the bit I copped to do my Burning Toyota Salesman post, here's the You Tube Python bit that inspired me

    Enjoy, then reread my post...

    [ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrzMhU_4m-g"]YouTube - She's a witch![/ame] ​

    and now for something compleatly different...

    KK6PD
     
    #2 KK6PD, Jan 6, 2009
  3. patsparks

    patsparks An Aussie perspective

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    I like it. Do I get my duck back?
     
    #3 patsparks, Jan 6, 2009
  4. TonyPSchaefer

    TonyPSchaefer Your Friendly Moderator
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    Most brilliant! Very well done.
     
    #4 TonyPSchaefer, Jan 6, 2009
  5. TonyPSchaefer

    TonyPSchaefer Your Friendly Moderator
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    #5 TonyPSchaefer, Jan 6, 2009
  6. Stev0

    Stev0 Honorary Hong Kong Cavalier

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    Now I want to write a bit with GM saying "I'm not dead yet!"
     
    #6 Stev0, Jan 7, 2009
  7. KK6PD

    KK6PD _ . _ . / _ _ . _

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    Its funny, in 1976 when PBS was first running Monty Python, I was an Engineer at a Local Access station (My 1st job WOW!) I had access to the first commercial grade VTR's. At that time they were HUGE. Cassettes were the size of books, and I would set the recorder to timer record MPFC EVERY Sunday night. When sufficient episodes were recorded, I "borrowed" the VTR and on Saturday night we would have MPFC parties. Truely an engineering event before its time, largest monitor I could fit into my van, audio through the stereo at high volume, and we would all get very drunk and laugh ourselves till it hurt watching the shows. I would record 4 shows in a row,party, anther 4 shows, anther party. when we ran out of new episodes, RERUNS, it didn't matter.

    Always has been, and always will be an influence on my life!!!
    So has the Firesign Theatre.

    After all,
    We are all Bozo's on this bus!!!
    KK6PD
     
    #7 KK6PD, Jan 7, 2009
  8. Kapena Gary

    Kapena Gary New Member

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    WOW!!!! Firesign Theater - I haven't heard a reference to them in - oh, say 30-35 years.

    They were incredible, especially while high on illegal substances.

    Thanks for reminding me. I think I have 8 tracks or cassettes of some of their albums up in the attic. I have no idea what happened to the albums I had.

    Civilization HO!!!!
     
    #8 Kapena Gary, Jan 7, 2009
  9. Stev0

    Stev0 Honorary Hong Kong Cavalier

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    Who is he talking to? And how does he makes his voice DO that?
     
    #9 Stev0, Jan 7, 2009
  10. KK6PD

    KK6PD _ . _ . / _ _ . _

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    Out of the Fog, and into the Smog he walks Ruthlessly, (I wonder where Ruth is) He's Nick Danger 3rd Eye.

    "My nostrils flared at the scent of his perfume: Pyramid Patchouli. There was only one joker in L.A. sensitive enough to wear *that* scent...and I had to find out who he was!"
    - That joker was Rocky Rococo

    KK6PD
     
    #10 KK6PD, Jan 7, 2009
  11. Kapena Gary

    Kapena Gary New Member

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    Let's play "Guess that disease!"
     
    #11 Kapena Gary, Jan 7, 2009
  12. swi66

    swi66 Member

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    Wow,
    Is it something about Prius owners that they appreciate the higher level humor of Monty Python?
    Just received the entire boxed Megaset of their series....................
     
    #12 swi66, Jan 7, 2009
  13. Doc Willie

    Doc Willie Shuttlecraft Commander

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    Firesign Theater !!


    "Old man!!! You MUST sign ze papers !!"
     
    #13 Doc Willie, Jan 7, 2009
  14. miscrms

    miscrms Plug Envious Member

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    I broke down and bought the entire set on VHS at Costco, one week before they put out the DVD set for the same price :rolleyes:

    Rob
     
    #14 miscrms, Jan 7, 2009
  15. SDP40F501

    SDP40F501 Junior Member

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    Nooobody expects the 2010 Prius Gen 3 exhibition!!! Our chief weapon is surprise, surprise and ... oh, damn that Bossdowner!

    :D
     
    #15 SDP40F501, Jan 7, 2009
  16. swi66

    swi66 Member

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    I cannot sign the papers, cause you have broken both of my hands.........

    Cheech and Chong.....Big Bambu album
     
    #16 swi66, Jan 8, 2009
  17. bwilson4web

    bwilson4web BMW i3 and Model 3

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    "You have Globner's disease. The only cure for which is death."
    (Firesign Theater)

    Bob Wilson
     
    #17 bwilson4web, Jan 8, 2009
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