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Are we the turkey?

Discussion in 'Fred's House of Pancakes' started by daniel, Mar 15, 2010.

  1. DaveinOlyWA

    DaveinOlyWA 3rd Time was Solariffic!!

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    actually, u r close. yes, we have what we need to flourish and yes, we dont appreciate what we have nor are we inclined to do anything to keep it and we will lose it and cry about it thinking like a 3 year old would that if we cried loudly enough, we would get another chance but we wont.

    we will go away, the Earth without us, will recover and others will come in and try it again.

    and besides, if what u say is true, God must be a soup lover, otherwise he would not have flooded the Earth
     
  2. daniel

    daniel Cat Lovers Against the Bomb

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    He's not Mafalda???
     
  3. burritos

    burritos Senior Member

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    Aren't turkeys descendants from dinosaurs? Cause that would make us dinosaurs which would be freaking awesome.
     
  4. daniel

    daniel Cat Lovers Against the Bomb

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    It's a metaphor. It's not literal. We are not descended from turkeys, though we are related to them, and to dinosaurs.

    When you get right down to it, every living thing, including us, is descended from bacteria, so we're all related. Dinosaur, turkey, human, muff fungus, slime mold, duckbill, snail, stinkbug, all related.
     
  5. lys

    lys AerodynamicMac

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    Couldn't it be as simple as a supernatural being (god?) creating a world, full of beings with their experiences, chances and fates, just to remain alive itself, in the experiences of all it lives?

    And it isn't incompatible with the compassion.
     
  6. daniel

    daniel Cat Lovers Against the Bomb

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    What would be the point of that? I think it unlikely that a god would create a world full of creatures if he didn't have some use for them. Christianity claims god made this world just for us, with no ulterior motives. Do farmers raise turkeys for the benefit of the turkeys? Do horticulturalists create a new variety of apple for the benefit of the apples? Nope. You create something for your own use. God is a cosmic chupaalmas.
     
  7. amm0bob

    amm0bob Permanently Junior...

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    Not according to DNA from the stuff I had read over the years... you kinda mixed up the chain a bit, all animals are descended from fungus... so are a lot of bacteria, but not all of em turned out to be animals...
     
  8. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    This metaphor that daniel keeps talking about, is it a turkey-like animal, only smaller?

    Tom
     
  9. amm0bob

    amm0bob Permanently Junior...

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    Hmmmm...


    I guess in all reality I'm more like a game hen then.
     
  10. daniel

    daniel Cat Lovers Against the Bomb

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    When I was in school we learned that the eukaryotes evolved from prokaryotes, which would make us descendants of bacteria. But now I see upon glancing at Wikipedia that there is now some controversy over this. Regardless, all plants and animals (all eukaryotes) are related. We share 50% of our genes with a mushroom! God may be cultivating our souls, as we cultivate mushrooms, to serve as spiritual seasoning for his more substantial spiritual sustenance. In a manner of speaking, we may be the mushrooms on his pizza. Or, more likely, he's a farmer of souls, selling us to the heavenly pizza corporation, which sells them (with us on them) to the other gods, a few of whom farm other ingredients on other worlds.
     
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  11. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    Does this pizza have turkey sausage?

    Tom
     
  12. daniel

    daniel Cat Lovers Against the Bomb

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    Everybody's so damn literal!
     
  13. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    Ah, so this is more like alphabet soup, or perhaps the cereal with little letters in it. Does the pizza have little letters made out of turkey?

    Tom
     
  14. amm0bob

    amm0bob Permanently Junior...

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    I think we are just reacting to the starring pussy... well... I'm probably just reacting to the starring pussy...

    I mean... what is going through the mind of the pussy right now... is it trying to project that it wants more turkey... or that there's enough turkey for it and the other gods...

    And what if the pussy is thinking we are indeed just a featherless turkey in need of some sauce before serving... I know my wife's last pussy definitely wanted sauce with hers... she didn't like turkey dried up... and it certainly wasn't beneath her to bite the hand that fed it; I had always believed it was a pussy taste-test to see whether or not I was seasoned properly...
     
  15. bisco

    bisco cookie crumbler

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    i don't know what you and allen are taking daniel, but i want some!
     
  16. PriusLewis

    PriusLewis Management Scientist

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    OK, let me see if I got this thread right: Tom now thinks every post has something to do with Turkeys (not a bad assumption considering who is doing the posting). Daniel is attempting to use logic as clear as String Theory to say he doesn't believe in something that will eat his soul - or not, because he doesn't believe in it, but he still fears it...wait, I think I'm in a loop...loop....loop....

    And I sit here believing in nothing but scientific method.

    At lunch I overheard a couple of guys discussing some arcaine christian religious point, and I think to myself "well, I guess they have a right to discuss superstition on their own time...". Hey, wait, they were eating hot dogs. I wonder if the dogs were made from turkey? Come to think of it, I ate the same hot dogs! Daniel is right! I wonder what the turkey that went into my hot dog thought as his head was being pulled off. I know what I thought when I ate him: YUM!!!
     
  17. daniel

    daniel Cat Lovers Against the Bomb

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    Well, Bob, you certainly managed to use the word "pussy" a lot. I hope you feel better now. :D

    Allan is not to blame for this thread. He brought up a perfectly reasonable point about unexpected events. I drew the analogy to humans' worship of god. As far as taking anything, I'm afraid I cannot help you. Those of us who are not entirely sane don't need to take anything to have our flights of fancy. Those of you who are sane may have to resort to drugs, but I lack sufficient experience in that realm to be able to offer any really useful suggestions. I hear that certain mushrooms may have the effect you desire.

    I think you've basically got it. I'm not entirely sure. But, yes, I am happy that I do not believe in god because as near as I can figure, god is a farmer of souls who is going to do something to us that we will very much not like, after we die. If he exists. Which I believe, and hope, that he does not.

    The turkeys and pizzas are metaphors. Not to be taken literally. But the danger (if there is a god) is very real. Just imagine all those pompous Bible-believing church-goers, so confident of paradise because they believe that Jesus is the christ, when they find themselves on the cosmic (metaphorical -- but very uncomfortable) pizza, being served at a party of gods, sucking the essence out of them like some creature from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. All those years of never dancing or screwing or laughing or going to movies, totally wasted.

    Pascal's wager assumes that god (if he exists) will be nice to us if we believe in him. It fails to account for the more probable possibility that god is going to grind us up for pizza flavoring if we believe in him, and pass us by unnoticed if we do not.
     
  18. Radiant

    Radiant New Member

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    What happens if you are non-pompus bible reading church goer who believes everyone will be saved because god it love and love saves all?

    Will I be eaten by love? Maybe, but if so then I think it might be a good experience.

    Don't worry Daniel, it will all be ok - of course you can escape. Heck, I'll help you open the barn door if you need it. Either way you will be fine.

    Hmmm, if you don't join the pizza party, where will you go?

    Crazy is relative, literally.
     
  19. amm0bob

    amm0bob Permanently Junior...

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    Bra... it's still staring at me... I do not feel better... especially when I am being relegated to a mealtime entre...
     
  20. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    So, are we going to talk turkey or not?

    Tom