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Coronavirus Jokes

Discussion in 'Fred's House of Pancakes' started by srellim234, Apr 4, 2020.

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  1. stevepea

    stevepea Senior Member

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    If kids toilet-papered neighborhood houses this year, the residents would send them thank-you cards!
     
    #121 stevepea, May 3, 2020
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  2. Prodigyplace

    Prodigyplace Senior Member

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    upload_2020-5-3_6-55-30.png
    upload_2020-5-3_6-57-42.png
     
    #122 Prodigyplace, May 3, 2020
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  3. Prodigyplace

    Prodigyplace Senior Member

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    From 2 years ago but appropriate now...
    Capture.PNG
     
    #123 Prodigyplace, May 3, 2020
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  4. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    "I don't think it's going to be that hard to stay 6 feet away from my wife during the outbreak...that's 94 feet closer than the restraining order says." .... #coronavirusjokes
     
    #124 srellim234, May 3, 2020
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  5. frodoz737

    frodoz737 Top Wrench

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    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
    #125 frodoz737, May 3, 2020
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  6. KennyGS

    KennyGS Senior Member

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    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
     
    #126 KennyGS, May 3, 2020
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  7. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    #127 srellim234, May 4, 2020
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  8. Prodigyplace

    Prodigyplace Senior Member

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    Pacman.png
     
    #128 Prodigyplace, May 4, 2020
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  9. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    It's even worse than that. In this game all the aisles are "One Way Only".
     
    #129 srellim234, May 4, 2020
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  10. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    The coronavirus has even affected ISIS. They've had to lay off all their suicide bombers due to insufficient crowd sizes.
     
    #130 srellim234, May 4, 2020
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  11. ChapmanF

    ChapmanF Senior Member

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    #131 ChapmanF, May 5, 2020
  12. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    For the record, I am a senior citizen and I know this is in really bad taste:

    Q. Why did the Corona virus cross the road?

    A. To help seniors cross to the other side.
     
    #132 srellim234, May 6, 2020
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  13. Leadfoot J. McCoalroller

    Leadfoot J. McCoalroller Senior Member

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    FullSizeRender.jpg
     
    #133 Leadfoot J. McCoalroller, May 6, 2020
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  14. Prodigyplace

    Prodigyplace Senior Member

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    #134 Prodigyplace, May 6, 2020
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  15. Prodigyplace

    Prodigyplace Senior Member

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    2020-05-07_1106.png
     
    #135 Prodigyplace, May 7, 2020
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  16. TMR-JWAP

    TMR-JWAP Senior Member

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    tasteless...yes, an we'll all be there one day
    funny as he77..absolutely
    an excellent take on an old classic..
     
    #136 TMR-JWAP, May 7, 2020
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  17. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    For the first time in history, we can help save the world just by lying on the couch watching TV all day.

    Turns out I've been saving the world for years.
     
    #137 srellim234, May 7, 2020
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  18. Stevewoods

    Stevewoods Senior Member

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    Look a little like the packets my "Uncle Sam" used to send me out with -- that and a P-38 -- I still carry a P-38 on my key ring -- plays havoc with pocket liners -- ask your grandpa what a key ring is...

    upload_2020-5-7_9-6-4.jpeg


    upload_2020-5-7_9-4-19.png
     
    #138 Stevewoods, May 7, 2020
    Last edited: May 7, 2020
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  19. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    A new question has been added to the mathematics section of the California high school proficiency exam:

    "Helen uses seven sheets of toilet paper every time she poops. She poops an average of twice a day. If she bought sixty 12-packs of 1000 sheet per roll toilet paper and the coronavirus isn't even in her suburb yet, how many days will the idiot's supply last?
     
    #139 srellim234, May 7, 2020
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  20. Mark57

    Mark57 2021 Tesla Model 3 LR AWD

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    I declare shenanigans. Who poops twice a day? Zoom, zoom.:p
     
    #140 Mark57, May 7, 2020
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