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The trolling thread

Discussion in 'Fred's House of Pancakes' started by Stev0, Dec 22, 2007.

  1. TonyPSchaefer

    TonyPSchaefer Your Friendly Moderator
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    I read on the CNW website that the increase in cancer over the past 20 years is due to the popularity of hybrids.

    WHY DO HYBRID OWNERS LOVE CANCER SO MUCH?!
    COMMIE HITLER LOVERS!!
     
  2. tleonhar

    tleonhar Senior Member

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    You don't get the mileage you think you are becaus Toyota secretly comes and adds a couple gallons of gas every night. This is why Toyota is loosing money on every one they sell.:p
     
  3. Stev0

    Stev0 Honorary Hong Kong Cavalier

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    Everybody knows the ONLY reason Prius owners bought their "Hybrids" is because THEY ALL HATE AMERICA.
     
  4. efusco

    efusco Moderator Emeritus
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    Buying a Prius immediately makes you gay (and that's a bad thing)!
     
  5. hobbit

    hobbit Senior Member

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    I put one of those tornado flow vortex inserts into my air filter
    and am routinely getting 80-85 mpg tanks.
    .
    _H*
     
  6. galaxee

    galaxee mostly benevolent

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    the hsd system doubles the weight of the car and therefore cancels out any mpg gain.
     
  7. AuntBee

    AuntBee New Member

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    And if you ever get caught in a lightning storm in your Prius, you can just forget it, because the lightning is drawn to the electric motor and will fry your A**.
     
  8. Mawcawfee

    Mawcawfee Prius-less (for now)

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    Only hippies drive Prii and hippies stink.
     
  9. hyo silver

    hyo silver Awaaaaay

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    You know you can't drive those things in the rain, don't you?
     
  10. TJandGENESIS

    TJandGENESIS Are We Having Fun Yet?

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    And I hear the car speaks in French!
     
  11. patsparks

    patsparks An Aussie perspective

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    Well that was apparently one of the reasons. But I love Australia!!
     
  12. theblackbag

    theblackbag New Member

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    Hybrids are too expensive, all you need to do to get great milage is run your car on water! Alternativly, a perpetual motion machine is just round the corner.

    And we don't need to worry about fuel anyway. The ay-rabs have an engine that runs off carbon di-oxide and emits clean air. They have enourmous quantitys of these things just sitting around waiting for the oil to run out.

    One more thing, Hybrids just aint safe. Emergency services are not allowed to come within 500 feets of your car if you crash it. The cabling is actually designed to fry all the occupants of the car in a crash situation, stops law suits against Toyota.
     
  13. Stev0

    Stev0 Honorary Hong Kong Cavalier

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    Australia? Isn't that next to the country of Europe?
     
  14. Tempus

    Tempus Senior Member

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    I prefer to troll with reliable source citations!

    http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Toyota_Prius

    The Toyota Prius is a hybrid automobile/car built by Toyota Motor Company, an automaker owned by the Ninth Circle of Hell-based megacompany Satan Brands Incorporated. Prius is a Latvian word meaning "tiny penis" upon translation.

    The Prius, like other hybrid cars, of course runs on gasoline and pure evil.

    Toyota originally termed the system as the "Super-Duty 2500 Cummins Turbodisel Ecoteckin' Drive System," but other companies complained of serious copyright infringement and threatened to sue. Toyota decided to subsequently rename the system as Hybrid Sinergy Drive (it has been found that "Sinergy" is commonly misspelled as "Synergy" due to a recently discovered and, of course, leaked PR cover-up). The system's switch from gasoline to pure evil has been noted as being almost undetectable, except for a faint screech of demons being melted by the combustion of the engine. Toyota does plan to address this minor problem with the next generation of the car.

    Some people also have expressed concerns of being possessed by the pure evil in an accident if it leaks from it's specific containers within the car. Toyota has not yet officially made a statement concerning this, but insiders within the company say that this cannot happen if you have the feature of having Jesus as your co-pilot. Unfortunately, many Prius drivers lack having the feature of having Jesus as their co-pilot, since almost 99.9 percent of Prius drivers are vegetarian, God-hatin', John Kerry-lovin' atheists. The feature can be installed although Toyota refuses to release information as to how.
     
  15. TonyPSchaefer

    TonyPSchaefer Your Friendly Moderator
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    HOLY CRAP!! I just about fell out of my chair reading that article. Thanks, Tempus. You just made my day.

    ROFLMFAO
     
  16. Rae Vynn

    Rae Vynn Artist In Residence

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    All Prius drivers engender road rage, as they are addicted to hypermiling, repeatedly surging up to 40 mph, and then letting the car glide down to 10 mph, on the Interstate freeway system.
     
  17. galaxee

    galaxee mostly benevolent

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    that prius driver who does 85 on the freeway has a malfunctioning speedometer.

    :ph34r:
     
  18. diamondlarry

    diamondlarry EPA MPG #'s killer

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    If someone with a pacemaker is walking on the sidewalk when a Prius drives by, the results could be a stopped or erratic heartbeat.
     
  19. apriusfan

    apriusfan New Member

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    I was told that Toyota was going to put a warning sticker on the car to disclose a danger to pacemakers from the EMF emissions of the main battery, but in the end, didn't because that might cause people to sue them over EMF radiation.
     
  20. TonyPSchaefer

    TonyPSchaefer Your Friendly Moderator
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    Larry, the same could be said about katherine Heigl.