Cheney's Got A Gun!

The press corp has come undone
From missin' out on the fun
What did he really do?
What a bore through and through!!!

Run away, run away from the game
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

 

[Broken External Image]:http://members.cox.net/aye-aye/fudd6xy.png

 

Good one, maggie, though the face is lacking some of the sneer usually enshrined on its left side.

If Dick's going to start shooting lawyers, I wish he'd shoot them en masse as they come out of their law school graduations, not when they're 78 and have largely done their deeds.

 

New NRA bumpersnicker?

Guns don't shoot people.
VPs shoot people.

 

Here's another.


Cheney's got a gun.

 

He kind of looks like Robin Hood in that picture. Except that he robs from the poor and gives it to the rich.

 

Of course, a 28 gauge isn't MUCH of a gun...

 

here is an email my dad sent me...

CHENEY SAYS SHOOTING OF FELLOW HUNTER WAS BASED ON FAULTY INTELLIGENCE

Believed Shooting Victim Was Zawahiri, Veep Says
Vice President Dick Cheney revealed today that he shot
a fellow hunter>while on a quail hunting trip over the weekend because he believed the
man was the fugitive terror mastermind Ayman al-Zawahiri.

Mr. Cheney acknowledged that the man he sprayed with pellets on
Saturday was not al-Zawahiri but rather Harry Whittington, a 78-year-old
millionaire lawyer from Austin, blaming the mix-up on "faulty
intelligence."

"I believed I had credible intelligence that al-Zawahiri had
infiltrated my hunting party in disguise with the intent of spraying me with
pellets," Mr. Cheney told reporters. "Only after I shot Harry in the
face and he shouted 'Cheney, you bastard' did I realize that this
intelligence was faulty."

Moments after Mr. Cheney's assault on Mr. Whittington, Mr. al-Zawahiri
appeared in a new videotape broadcast on al-Jazeera to announce that
he was uninjured in the vice president's attack because, in his words, "I
was in Pakistan."

An aide to the vice president said he believed that the American
people would believe Mr. Cheney's version of events, but added, "If he was going to
shoot any of his cronies right now it's a shame it wasn't Jack Abramoff."

At the White House, President George W. Bush defended his vice
president's shooting of a fellow hunter, saying that the attack sent
"a strong message to terrorists everywhere."

"The message is, if Dick Cheney is willing to shoot an innocent
American citizen at point-blank range, imagine what he'll do to you," Mr. Bush
said.

 

If'n it wahr even a 20, ol' Harry'da bin dayed.

 

"VICE PRESIDENT Dick Cheney accidentally shot documentary filmmaker Michael Moore yesterday as Moore was walking out of a Manhattan Denny's.

A spokesperson for the vice president said that it was a "complete accident" and that Cheney felt "horrible." The White House released a statement saying that the shooting was "just bad timing. Vice President Cheney, who is well-versed in firearms safety, was merely sitting in a shrub, wearing camouflage, outside of a Denny's frequented by Mr. Moore." The statement went on to say that Cheney had been in the shrub for "several days." Moore is said to have suffered only minor injuries and was released from the hospital.

IN ANOTHER BIZARRE accident, Cheney mistakenly shot every Democratic member of the Senate Judiciary Committee. A White House spokesman said that the vice president feels "bad, but not that bad." An aide to Cheney said that the vice president "happened to be in the committee chambers, under a chair, when he stood up to put on a pair of chaps, accidentally shooting the committee members, stopping to reload three times." Remarkably, the committee members were largely unhurt and are expected to make complete recoveries.

THE WHITE HOUSE was put on the defensive again today when Air Force Two was forced to make an emergency landing 25 miles west of New York City after a loss of cabin pressure because of the accidental shooting of former FEMA Director Michael D. Brown and Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff. Both men have recently come under criticism for their handling of the federal response to Hurricane Katrina. Cheney was said to be "laughing, but also deeply concerned" when he was awoken from a nap after accidentally shooting the men at close range. Typically, shotguns are not allowed on either Air Force One or Two, but Cheney is, the statement said, "a seasoned hunter and also planned to accidentally shoot both men." Both Brown and Chertoff are expected to make complete recoveries, although it remains unclear as to why Brown was duct-taped to the wing of the plane.

A White House spokesman later added that the vice president had been on his way to New York City to accidentally shoot New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd.

SEN. HILLARY Rodham Clinton miraculously escaped injury today after Cheney accidentally ran up to her motorcade and accidentally shot at her car. The White House said the vice president "tripped."

"These things happen," a White House spokesman said. "Guns, while completely safe, are also dangerous."

A member of the vice president's staff said Cheney apologized to the former first lady and potential presidential candidate in a handwritten note.

"I'm sorry I almost shot you. But know that I will try again and will also be sorry then too. I like the sound a gun makes and the smell of the gunpowder. 'Flint' is a neat word. ""

He loves the smell of gunpowder.

 

...with 8 shot too...

 

I hate it when the Coke bubbles go through your nose.

 

WASHINGTON, D.C. - A white house source stated that Congress is considering awarding Vice-President Dick Cheney the Medal of Freedom, the national highest ivilian commendation, for his act of bravery in shooting an attorney. The source was quoted to say " All Americans have wanted to shoot a lawyer at one time or another and Cheney actually had the balls to do it".
In a related story, the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department, which issues hunting licenses, said that it will start requiring hunters, wishing to bag a lawyer, to have the new "lawyer's stamp" on their hunting license. Currently Texas hunters are required to carry stamps for hunting birds, deer, and bear, at a cost of $7 annually.

The new "lawyers stamp" will cost $100, but open season will be all year long. The department further stated that although the "lawyers stamp" comes at hefty price,
sales have been brisk and it is believed it will generate annual revenues in excess of $3 billion dollars the first year. Other states are considering similar hunting license stamps. Be sure to keep in mind the fair chase provisions of lawyer hunting. No hunting within 100 yards of a traffic accident or job injury site as this is considered hunting over a baited field.

 

Earlier this year, I performed the following adaptation of "Knocking on Heaven's Door" by Bob Dylan at a church coffeehouse- it was a big hit

Knocking on Cheney’s Door
(B. Dylan/M. Larkin)

Ma, take this badge off of me,
I can’t use it any more.
There’s been a massacre down in Texas
And now I’m Knocking on Cheney’s Door

Knock, Knock Knocking on Cheney’s Door
Knock, Knock Knocking on Cheney’s Door
Knock, Knock Knocking on Cheney’s Door
Knock, Knock Knocking on Cheney’s Door

Ma, take these guns away from me,
I can’t shoot them anymore.
I shot my buddy in the face,
And now they’re Knocking on Cheney’s Door

Knock, Knock Knocking on Cheney’s Door (4x)

Ma, take these guns away from me,
Before they send me off to jail.
It was an honest mistake
Confusing a lawyer with a quail.

Knock, Knock Knocking on Cheney’s Door (4x)

Ma, better send Karl Rove.
The liberal media is on my back.
What’s Whittington’s problem anyway?
He’s only had one heart attack!

Knock, Knock Knocking on Cheney’s Door (4x)

Ma, take this gun away from me.
I can’t shoot it any more.
It’s not my fault I never learned to shoot straight.
I had five deferments in the Vietnam War.

Knock, Knock Knocking on Cheney’s Door (repeat)

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(barbaram @ Jun 23 2006, 12:47 PM) [snapback]275892[/snapback]</div>

LOL! :lol: