I just heard on the news...

that American Farm Bureau is buying the bad half of General Motors, the Hummer and Saturn part.








The new initials for GM will now be GMAFB.











:drum:

 

Interesting sidebar to GMAFB...

Here are today’s top headlines.

Exxon promises to bail out General Motors.

The UAW launches an effort to expand its ranks. And the Smithsonian Institute makes a remarkable discovery. Up next, we’ll be back with the news behind the headlines.

This is Autoline Daily for Wednesday, April first, 2009, and now, the news.

The Exxon Corporation announced today that it is ready to pay off all of GM’s debts and provide the company with the cash that it needs to drop its dependency on the government. But there are strings attached. Exxon says it will only provide this money if GM cancels its plans to bring out the Chevrolet Volt.

Since no one else wanted it, and General Motors couldn’t afford to close it down, the Sierra Club made a bold move and bought the Hummer brand yesterday. The environmental organization grabbed the automaker after rumors spread on the internet that it was developing an alternative-fuel H3. Called the H3-EV, for environmental vigilante, the truck will now be fueled by donkey dung and bat guano.

With all the trouble in the auto industry, UAW membership is plummeting, so the union just announced a major recruiting drive. To stave off a collapse, the union is moving away from traditional manufacturing sectors and will now focus its organizing effort on the U.S. Congress. Union president Ron Gettelfinger testified in Washington that members of Congress were very interested in the idea of eliminating the secret ballot, and having the union handle the job of negotiating pay raises with American taxpayers.