THEY TELL YOU WHERE TO GET OFF

Hi Kiloran, I couldn't get your link to work... maybe I have to be registered?

I did a search and came up with http://pqasb.pqarchiver.com/chicagotribune...ERE+TO+GET+OFF+
But that doesn't appear to be it either... sorry.

 

funny I was able to get it earlier, and now I can't

 

http://www.bugmenot.com

 

Ok, so there would probably be some bad possible choices for the NAV Voice too.

Joe Cocker?

Wolfman Jack?

Louis Armstrong?

Phyllis Diller?

 

Larry King

the Chipmunks

Rochester (from the Jack Benny radio show)

Tiny Tim ("personality" from Johnny Carson---70's---for younger folks)

Truman Capote

 

how about Goofy. "Yep, aaaa, you want to turn aaa right here, yep!" Or how about Donald Duck. " Quacky quack quack!, Turn left!" If you want anoying, try Olive Oil. There is Woody Woodpecker and his laugh. "ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha"

 

Bad NAV voice:

The Prince of Darkness, aka Ozzy

Mickey Mouse

Road Runner "Meemeep"

That announcer guy "voice of GOD" from all movie trailers.
OR even worse;
The announcer guy for any off-roading event. "Monster Truck Mainia!!!"

 

"Date is SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAYYY!!!!"

:lol:

Vanilla Ice would be a fine (bad) nav voice choice.

Patrick Stewart would be a good one.

Or The Gloriously Bloated and Toupeed One (Shatner):

"TURN! .... .... LEFT! .... Damn it! LEFT, I SAY NOT .... .... RIGHT!"

 

Why not Jerry "Why why why? Oh George, if you turn right one more time wouldn't we be going in a circle? Well, wouldn't we have to be?"

One of the new sitcoms needs to do a show about this. They buy a new state-of-the-art car and on the way home they don't know how to stop the NAV destination voice and it's Jerry Sienfield. As a tribute the whole show is just them getting lost because the voice is screwing them up.

Edit:
More ideas for my sitcom script. Maybe we use Two And A Half Men. Alan is looking to buy a car and he finds this crazy sales guy at a dealer about 60 miles away. The sales guy tells him about a car that was special ordered for the star Jerry Sienfield. This becomes a take-off of the Sienfield episode where George gets suckered into buying a car because he was told it used to be owned by an actor (can't remember his name).

Charlie tries to talk Alan out of it but then gives in because he thinks it will be funny and goes along just to be the devil on Charlie's shoulder. Once they finaly get to the dealer they see the car. It's all decked out with extra chrome and velvet interior. The seatbelts are fluffy and the floor mats say Sienfield in the stitching. Let's just say it's a sore sight for any eyes but Jerry's. The dealer tells them that Jerry backed out of buying the car because they forgot to paint his name on the roof and demanded they make a whole new one.

Alan doesn't realy like the car and Charlie is laughing his nice person off. But the sales guy is so good that they end up driving it home. When they start the car it plays the theme song from Sienfield. On the way home the NAV voice (narrated by Jerry of course) is saying all kinds of crazy stuff. The CD changer is loaded with audio books on how to pick up women and polka music. They decide to take the car back and start to get lost because the NAV voice is telling them to go home and they can't shut him up and they don't know how to reprogram the destination. They try to use the OnStar feature but it's preprogrammed to call Jerry's parents (the annoying ones from the show).

That's enough for today.

 

Bad: Fran Dreshler ("What the hell are you thinking? Turn right, already!")

Good: Ellen Degeneres ("You know, I think you should turn right. Turn right. No, turn right... turn right right now... oh... my... you missed it. Now you have to back up. Put the electronic shift knob in reverse... yeah, that thingy sticking out of the dash. Move it over and up. Thaaaat's right......)

 

Mr T. - I pitty the fool who dont turn right

http://msnbc.msn.com/id/10038326/
Is driving easier when Mr. T’s riding shotgun?
To cash in on in-car GPS market, media firm to offer celebrity directions

 

That's hilarious! Especially when thinking of it in that computerized monotone.

Oh, and the rest were funny, too.

Which brings up Zapp Brannigan: "Turn right here, Kif. And tell the men they're doing a good job with that gas mileage. I'm going to retire to my boudoir for a while. I just downloaded a picture of Leela in her birthday suit....."

And how about Stewie? "Yes yes, Lois... You must turn right here... That's it. Now FLOOR IT!! (Prius hits a brick wall) Victory is mine!! ........... Oh damn those front airbags!!!"

 

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

I do like the suggestion for Patrick Stewart: "Number One, Right Turn Warp One.....engage!"

Or maybe the computer voice on the Enterprise: "Computer records indicate there is no such destination,....please restate your question."

Maybe GW: "uh, where are we going again?"

Maybe a stereotyped Baptist minister: "And the Lord shall strike thee down...if you don't take a right turn now. I say unto thee....turn now or repent."