Why do birds **** on a newly washed car?

Yes... yes it is...

 

They crap on dirty cars to. You just don't notice it when they're dirty.

 

They have different digestive system. They can't hold it. Once the food is digested, it came right out.

Oh, they don't pee too. Everything (both liquid and solid) came out from the same pipe.

 

Nah you are all wrong. The birds are having a contest. Who ever shits on the cleanest car gets bonus points or an extra worm.

 

Freshly washed cars are shinier and easier to spot from the air.

If I'm ever bald, I will never wax my head.

 

I agree with hyo. They're attracted to shiny things. And naturally they poop. So there's an increased chance they will poop on shiny things.

You should pick up a bottle of Meguiar's Quik Detailer and keep it in your car. It's literally made for times like you desribed.

 

Just like some people I know , they only respond to shiny things in front of them. In the case of birds, shiny things below! I try not park under trees or power lines where birds can roost.

 

I believe it is because birds have a mental disorder, like a compelsion, according to Barney Fife. They see things from the air so they have a different perspective. Since most people don't have a shiny, clean car, the birds do their best to try to make them all match. In other words, to birds, a shiny, clean car is out of place and it gets under their skin (or feathers). To relieve themselves of this irritant, they relieve themselves on the irritant.

Ever notice how a bird will fly erratically around a window pane on a house? The glass is shiny, irritating the bird. The bird can't seem to find the proper angle to dirty it up, so he/she flies around it erratically...

 

There seems to be a resident flock of geese at the office. I believe they poop as part of their landing sequence. Since I park in the last row next to the grass I like them better when they are on the other side of the street.

 

Gary Larson's Far Side explored this in at least one cartoon, maybe more.

Didn't the car have a target on the roof?

 

Hello Grumpy,
This always happened to me as well. I think birds all over the world are the same. I'm in California and whenever I wax and shine my black beauty and parked in the Mall or somewhere outdoor, those creatures were always like to drop their xxxx onto my car. Most annoying were those from seagulls. Each one of it must with a small piece of sea shell inside. If you just wipe it without care,the seashell will make a scratch on the paint. I think they don't like the shinning,may be.

 

Don't know why.

Possible solution:

Car Anti-bird Poop Device

Caution: Not suitable viewing for young children,
latte swilling eco-hippies, etc.

 

Grumpy, In the grand scheme of life, some days you're the bird; and some days you're the newly washed Prius!

Happy Motoring Grasshopper,

Tom

 

Reminds me of the Guam based Air Force Squadrons. All of the planes had bird streaks down the sides of the tails. Despite all efforts to keep the tails from being prime bird bathrooms, it was a never-ending nasty problem.....except when one of the airmen noticed that the adjacent squadron did not have any streaks every time he looked.

He finally went and asked one of the crew chiefs what was the secret. The crew chief took him up to the top of one of the planes. Glued across the entire top of the tail was a row of thumbtacks pointing up.

 

hehe..wicked!