Coronavirus Jokes

Discussion in 'Fred's House of Pancakes' started by srellim234, Apr 4, 2020.

  1. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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  2. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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  3. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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  4. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    From the new 2021 IKEA collection:


    [​IMG]
     
  5. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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  6. jerrymildred

    jerrymildred Senior Member

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    Our new air purifier can smell them. :oops:

    [edit to add:] Even when I can't. :oops::oops::rolleyes:
     
    #406 jerrymildred, Mar 31, 2021
    Last edited: Mar 31, 2021
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  7. R-P

    R-P Active Member

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    So how does this work, you hear it rev up if someone let off a silent one? Or am I taking it too seriously?
     
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  8. jerrymildred

    jerrymildred Senior Member

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    Yup! We have it on auto and it just idles along at low speed. When it senses something in the air, the speed increases and the negative ion generator kicks on for a couple minutes. Just running on low, it has made a huge impact on dust in our house even though it's just sized for a medium-sized room.
     
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  9. privilege

    privilege Member

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    person getting shot: "so how long till I can go to concerts, hug people and stop wearing masks?"

    person giving shot: "you need to continue everything you've been doing for the foreseeable future "

    person getting shot: "but, I thought"

    that's it, that's the joke.
     
  10. privilege

    privilege Member

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    I tried to find the one that showed people standing in line to eat with their faces covered, and then having a force field cover them as soon as they were seated

    but I failed.

    guess this airport one will do
    airport-airplane.jpg
     
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  11. R-P

    R-P Active Member

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    Got my first shot today. Now my arm hurts. Maybe I shouldn't have fended off the needle...



    (Poor joke just to let you know I DID get my first shot last Tuesday, ahead of many others as I am in an at-risk-group. And my arm DOES hurt... ModeRNA vaccination.)
     
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  12. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    I went up to the UNLV student Union today and got my second dose. Since they're administering thousands of doses a day do those qualify as mass shootings on a school campus?
     
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  13. R-P

    R-P Active Member

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    Then it must be fake.


    (Maybe I'm not understanding correctly as I get part of my info from memes, but are there actually people claiming schoolshootings are fake? Maybe not something for a house-of-pancakes-thread...)
     
  14. Prodigyplace

    Prodigyplace Senior Member

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    This came up on today's calendar.
    upload_2021-4-3_10-39-36.png
     
  15. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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    I bought a world map and handed my wife a dart. I told her, "Throw this dart at the map. Wherever it lands, that's where I'm going to take you for a vacation when this pandemic stuff ends." Looks like we'll be spending two glorious weeks on the floor behind the refrigerator in the kitchen.
     
  16. jerrymildred

    jerrymildred Senior Member

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    One of my earliest childhood memories comes from behind the fridge. I was just a toddler at the time. I had an ear infection and it turned out that I was allergic to the antibiotic they gave me. The giant flies were coming after me and even though I was just a little squirt, I pushed the refrigerator out enough to get behind it. I don't remember the infection but I remember the flies and hiding in the dust bunnies. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it. :LOL:
     
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  17. privilege

    privilege Member

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    best joke this week...

    NPR yesterday morning:
    ” look, the blessed pandemic IS NOT OVER !! you still have to stay at home and remain diligent about blah blah blah"

    but then immediately start praising the winners of the women's basketball tournament. you know, tournaments that showcase women's sports being just a good as men's sports are incredibly important. so important in fact, that there is no mention of "staying home" or "virtual basketball" or "distancing in these troubling times" , you know, what everyone else is expected to do.

    LoL it's such a bad joke, but they keep telling it over and over
     
  18. ChapmanF

    ChapmanF Senior Member

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    Entire tournament confined to San Antonio venues rather than across country as usual ...

    Entire NCAA women's basketball tournament to be held in San Antonio area

    NCAA Division I Women’s Basketball Championship to allow limited fan attendance | NCAA.org - The Official Site of the NCAA

    Can we get back to jokes here? There's already a forum for political snark.
     
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  19. srellim234

    srellim234 Senior Member

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  20. LesGas

    LesGas Junior Member

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