Hazards/flashers not working + don't blink upon remote lock/unlock

Hi all. Second post, hope someone can help. Great info on this board.

I just bought a used 2014 Prius Five (hatch, not V) with 147k on it. Good service records, seemed like an honest and detail-oriented seller. I think I was so obsessed with Dr. Prius and the traction battery health (which wasn't great, but that's another thread - I think) and lulled into a sense of safety by a pre-purchase inspection by a mechanic that I missed some crap (as did the damn mechanic).

The hazards/flashers don't work. No clicking, no lights on dash, no lights blinking outside. Pressing the red hazard button does nothing. Also: maybe related (since it's all 4 lights at once?) is I've noted an absence of flashing lights when I lock or unlock the car via the fob. It just beeps, no lightshow.

Blinkers work. I pulled fuses this morning in the engine compartment (the 2nd 10A down, apparently) and #28 in the cabin. Both looked fine. I broke my old back contorting myself in a search for the relay just to see where it was, and with the blinkers on it sounds and feels (strong click) normal.

Could it be the hazard switch itself?

I hope this is my main problem for a while with the car but I have a sinking feeling it won't be! Thank you.

 

Bueller?