THE LOSERS THREAD

Try a Unitarian "church". Lots of humanists there. You said teetolaler so the nearest Hash House Harrier group is out of the question but there are probably lots of atheist teetotalers that are Unitarians.

Thankee. I figured it was a holiday thing. I'll check out Dr E's pics. The instructions seem really clear, but then again I haven't actually opened up the glove box yet....

 

Not necessarily...it might mean that you are not willing to settle for anyone just to be in a relationship.

I know several people who are so afraid of being alone that they rushed into miserable marriages. I know others who are very happy being single with the independence that offers. Everyone is different---and that does not mean they are "losers." The only way to become a loser is for you to believe that you are a loser.

Well, at least Christmas is over now.

But, New Year's will be here in no time!

 

Ditto on that one, and it wouldn't be the first time. I average about 50% so far. Now I pretty much just buy something close to what she wants, knowing perfectly well that she'll likely exchange it anyway. Sometimes though, she actually loves what I get her, and that makes up for the general incompetence. Yes, there is some level of loser there.


Unfortunately though, that's as far as I can go with loserness. I'm blessed with a wonderful family, and have much of my extended family here in Florida as well. Christmas is a wonderful time of the year.

As for the tree thing, I guess you can criticize Americans as being lazy and unable to appreciate the outdoors. I'll heartily disagree though, as this is a tradition that my family practiced in Norway, and continued ot practice here in the USA. I have no interest in changing it. It has nothing to do with my level of outdoor activity or any other ridiculous nonsense that you wish to assign to it. It is a long running family tradition that I still enjoy.

If you want to incorporate some Hindu philosophy to it, it is actually the proper thing to do. There is dharma and karma. Dharma is you "divine responsibility," or it says what you are supposed to do in your life. Now, you don't need to do it, you have the choice to do whatever you want. Where the karma comes in is if you fulfil your dharma, then you get lots of good karma. You did your job, and you will thusly be rewarded. If you decide not to follow your comsmic destiny, then you are likewise not given the karma to proceed to the next level. So in this case, the tree was fulfilling his/her dharma by becoming my Christmas tree. The tree will now be reborn as a more majestic and glorious tree. I am proud to have helped this tree fulfil its destiny.

 

Well yes, it was self-serving. I was using a 10,000 year old religious philosophy for my own purposes, but I do see it as applicable. If you want to expand it to include those other things also, then that is by all means your right. There are probably a few million Hindus who would disagree with this overly broad interpretation, but whatever.

I'm sorry you were alone on Christmas. No one should be, whether you think the holiday is a bunch of crap or not. Christmas is no longer a Christian thing, but rather a time for family and friends. We celebreate and have a tree (and a menorah), but there is nothing really religious about it. That's why we drove down to Miami. My wife's grandfather is in the hospital (hospice), and we didn't want her grandmother to be alone. Somehow a phone call doesn't cut it.

As for the dating scene. I know wone thing. It's not something you can force. Working at it doesn't greatly improve your chances. Once you reduce it to a task that needs to completed, then it's almost no longer worth it. In medical school I was greatly frustrated by all the girls at the school. After only a short time I gave up, saying that I would swear off girls for a long time, and just worry about school. It would greatly simplify my life, and save some cash too. Well wouldn't you know, only a few weeks after swearing off girls, I met my wife. Since I was not actively seeking any sort of companion (already had a pet tarantula, so what more did I need), things went much more smoothly. I wasn't concerneed about impressing her, and made no effort at all in trying to "hook up." Well, all I can say is the now we have two kids with #3 on the way. That's just the way it happens.

 

It's all in your head.



Seriously, you're your own worst enemy.lol I've been there (and still am sometimes), and the only way to get over it, is simply to, as Nike said, do it. One tactic is to get turned down as much as possible in a short span of time, to the point where it becomes numb, and you can just laugh at it. The other is to try and be super-cocky and almost arrogant about it, the idea being to project as much inner confidence as possible. It's one of those things where the more you think about it, the more you plot and plan, the worse it comes out, and THEY can see that pretty quick.

If all else fails, get a motorcycle. Seriously. Doesn't have to be a rice-rocket, just a simple cruiser will do. I could not believe the sheer volume of people I met when I got my bike. Plus, I heard somewhere, that one of the most used search terms by women on dating sites is, "motorcycle".... I actually dated a chick once just because of the bike (she loved riding 2-up), of course it was never going to last, but hey, it was stupid fun for a while.

 

Oh wow! There's an odd, unexpected tidbit... I was just going to mention that you must have SOME sort of coordination for Morse code... Hmm, as for the dancing part, there is a type of music for which you might fit right in: punk: something like Billy Idol's Dancing With Myself, or something like Nine Inch Nails, where the more you thrash about, the "cooler" you look... Just figured I'd throw that out there, maybe go to a local club that's playing some type of heavy rock music, where maybe even a 'mosh' pit forms... it's one of those things that seems like it might be 'ok', but turns out to be hella fun... lots of younger chicks like older dudes, the whole 'sugardaddy' thing... seriously, my uncle is in his late 40's, he's got no coordination, and oddly enough, is into the whole Ham radio thing (kb1djc) is his call sign, and somehow, he manages to pick up chicks. One was even 28! It's almost unbelievable actually....